Couple Relationship Counselling & Psychotherapy in East Devon & by Skype

Michael Friedrich provides Couple Relationship Counselling & Psychotherapy by Skype & Facetime in your own home anywhere in the world and in his consulting rooms in Exeter & in Seaton, East Devon, UK.

Couple Counselling is a way in which couples can meet with someone else so that difficulties in the relationship can be diminished.

Why do people have difficulties with relationships?



Communication Difficulties - it's so easy to say the wrong thing, especially when you're feeling angry, frightened or insecure. It's easy to have misunderstandings 

Fear of Relationships

Often it's because we're frightened. If we have a relationship, the number one thing we're sure of is that we'll lose it.  We'll die or they'll die.  They'll leave us or we'll leave them.  We're all afraid of these cruel facts of life and the more we love and value someone, the more terrified we are of these potential losses.  But, we're usually not aware of this terror.  It's just a background feeling which informs the actions and decisions of our lives without us giving proper thought to it.
We are also often frightened of conflict in relationships.  We get frightened about our messy feelings and needs getting mixed up with the other person's messy feelings and needs.  We get anxious that if there's a conflict, the other person won't like us or might abandon us. 

Childhood Trauma Concerning Relationships

Often the high level of our terrors and our dysfunctional responses to these terrors
 are informed by our childhood experiences. Childhood neglect, abandonment or abuse clearly will tend to lead a person to feel, once bitten, twice shy and they'll tend to avoid relating in various ways.  Either they'll have relationships which are not really relationships or they'll have no relationship at all. 

Sometimes these childhood difficulties are not immediately apparent.  Adoption, for example, is often looked on within the family of adoption as an unalloyed good thing.  However, the child often wonders why their birth mother and father abandoned them and they may not admit it to themselves, but the feelings around this issue can be complex and painful. These kinds of feelings could impede a person's capacity to establish relationships.

Micro communíications within family cultures can also be damaging and hinder a person's capacity to relate.  All families have their own cultures.  This concept encompasses something about the general mood and attitude of the family - the way in which the family relates to the world.  Micro communications are the subtexts of communication - the undercurrents of what is being said.  So on the surface things are calm and normal, but underneath the message might be that the world is a dangerous and frightening place and difficult feelings cannot be had.  

How to Get and Keep Relationships

The romantic idea of finding your one true love and living happily ever after is probably always a myth.  If you just follow your feelings, you'll probably find someone whose  difficulties fit in with yours and you might well keep on repeating the same patterns that your family taught you.

It is never possible to disengage completely from our family history which has been in the process of developing for generations, but it is possible through love and very hard work to decrease some of the pathology and improve the quality of our relationships.

How do we do this?  The first thing to do is to become more self aware.  This is very difficult, because we are usually highly uncritical and unaware of our own mind games and psychological defences.  Why would the hidden, disavowed secrets inside our heads want to know about themseves or investigate themselves with rigorous honesty?  So, if we've spent years fooling ourselves with specific attitudes and processes and self deception, why would we be even problematising them?  We just take them for granted as part of the texture of our lives and defend ourselves from knowing about unpleasant or frightening things in our inner world.

The best way out of this impasse is to have someone else looking in from outside.  Currently the most effective way in which that might happen is to have therapy using a therapeutic methodology such as psychoanalysis, where there is a measure of safety, but also a measure of challenge.  The therapist and client set out on a voyage of uncovery, i.e. uncovering and problematising all the old cover ups and defences, so that the client can then have more options in their life.

Our contact details are:


ewpsychotherapy@gmail.com
Landline 0044 (0)1297 625006

Michael's mobile 0044 (0)7989 000088

11 Wessiters, Seaton, Devon, EX12 2PW, U.K

We offer Psychotherapy, Counselling and Supervision from our consulting room in Seaton, for East Devon, West Dorset, South Somerset and worldwide by Skype. Michael  provides an Individual and Couple Therapy service and supervision for psychotherapists & counsellors in Exeter for one day a week. In addition to individual psychoanalytic psychotherapy, Michael offers Couple / Relationship Counselling and he provides Continuing Professional Development Training to psychotherapists and counsellors. Monika provides the additional service of EMDR Therapy, which can be helpful with trauma and phobias. Are you experiencing difficulties with your relationship? Are you feeling depressed or generally upset? Do you get to feel overwhelmed by anxiety, stress or panic attacks? Are you dealing with painful feelings due to loss or bereavement? Have you had a recent change in your life leading to stressful feelings? Do you have difficult feelings around adoption? Do you have painful feelings due to emotional, sexual or physical abuse in childhood? Do you think that you and your partner might benefit from couple counselling? Are you suffering from painful feelings due to separation or divorce? Are issues around your sexuality or sexual problems concerning you? Are you struggling with strong feelings such as irritability, guilt or envy? Do you feel frustrated because you cannot become who you really are? Are you bothered by feelings of worthlessness, low self- esteem or lack of confidence? Are you using food, drugs, alcohol or gambling in a way that's detrimental to you? Do you feel alone or isolated? Do you suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder? Are you feeling very uncomfortable in your family or at work? Is life becoming very difficult or unbearable due to any of the above feelings or situations? Michael Friedrich provides Couple Relationship Counselling & Psychotherapy by Skype & Facetime in your own home anywhere in the world and in his consulting room in Seaton, East Devon, UK. Couple Counselling is a way in which couples can meet with someone else so that difficulties in the relationship can be diminished. We work from our consulting rooms in Seaton, Devon,  providing counselling, psychotherapy & supervision for Exeter, Exmouth, Budleigh Salterton, Colyton, Sidmouth, Honiton, Seaton, Axminster, Chard, Lyme Regis, Charmouth, Beaminster, Crewkerne, Tiverton, Dorchester, Cullompton, Tauntom, Yeovil, Ottery St Mary or Bridport. We work from our consulting rooms in Seaton, Devon,  providing counselling, psychotherapy & supervision for Exeter, Exmouth, Budleigh Salterton, Colyton, Sidmouth, Honiton, Seaton, Axminster, Chard, Lyme Regis, Charmouth, Beaminster, Crewkerne, Tiverton, Dorchester, Cullompton, Tauntom, Yeovil, Ottery St Mary or Bridport.  We provide a wide range of counselling, psychotherapy & supervision services. We can help people with the followowing  issues: depression & anxiety relationship issues, difficulties with self esteem,  problems around adoption,  substance misuse, bereavement , effects of childhood trauma, a sense of lack of meaning to life, creative & artistic struggles, professional, sexual or spiritual identity issues.  We provide Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy and Psychodynamic Counselling by Skype. Skype, phone & Facetime psychoanalytic supervision.  We provide psychoanalytic and psychodynamic supervision for counsellors, psychotherapists and psychologists. We do this in person, in our consulting room in East Devon and by Skype, Facetime or phone for therapists working anywhere in the world. Of course it can seem difficult working with a supervisor you haven't met, but sometimes there isn't an appropriately qualified and experienced supervisor working locally. If at all possible, we like to have an initial one or two face to face sessions. The theoretical model we use is psychoanalytic and psychodynamic and our preferred way of working is similar to that described in Patrick Casement's book, " On Learning from the Patient" - in other words, a modern British Object Relations approach, favouring the work of Winnicott and Bion. However, because we have worked extensively in the NHS, we are pragmatic in our approach. We consider that the central task of the supervisor is to provide a facilitative environment to assist the therapist in following the content of the client's material, both what is on  the surface and what the underlying meanings might be. We also place a strong emphasis on keeping the therapist and patient safe. This means helping the therapist to maintain a manageable caseload and also helping them with risk assessment.Please feel free to call us to have a free preliminary discussion to explore whether it might be a good enough fit. We are open to working with counsellors, psychotherapists and psychologists who haven't had a formal psychodynamic or psychoanalytic training. We provide psychoanalytic & psychodynamic supervision in Seaton, Devon. We therefore provide a face to face supervision service for places like: Sidmouth, Lyme Regis, Honiton, Axminster, Exeter, Bridport & Chard. From September, Michael will be providing psychoanalytic and psychodynamic supervision in Exeter, therefore providing a service for surrounding areas such as: Bridport, Weymouth, Poole, Bournemouth, Yeovil, Sherborne, Wimborne, Beaminster and Blandford Forum. We also provide supervision by Skype & phone. The theoretical model we use is psychoanalytic and psychodynamic. Counselling can help sensitive people in various ways.  Sensitive people tend to be more easily hurt and troubled by difficult experiences than the rest of the population. It is therefore very common that counselling clients are highly sensitive. Psychotherapists can help highly sensitive people with these emotional difficulties resultant from being highly sensitive in what is often an abrasive and traumatising world. Also, therapists can explain to highly sensitive people that their particular temperament has a lot of advantages. This re-framing can be very useful because we live in a world where people in power are often not so sensitive and where the dominant ideology is anti - sensitive and sensitive people are often thus defined negatively I have a long and wide ranging experience of working with difficulties pertinent to men in my work in the NHS, privately and in the voluntary sector.  I offer psychoanalytic psychotherapy from my consulting rooms in Exeter and in Seaton, Devon. I also work over the phone and with Skype for anywhere in the world.  Michael Friedrich I have a long and wide ranging experience of working with difficulties pertinent to women in my work in the NHS, privately and in the voluntary sector.  I offer counselling/psychotherapy from my consulting room in Seaton, east Devon & over the phone and with Skype anywhere in the world

 














 

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